Music Festival Organisers Ask Crowd Not To Have Sex With Pizzas
Written by Tom Williams on 11th January, 2018
CHECK OUT THE LATEST
Organisers of the annual Holy Ship! music festival have introduced a bizarre new rule for ticket-holders: Don’t have sex with the pizza.
The nautical EDM festival, which takes place on a cruise ship and is known for its wild parties, has apparently had an important new sign
erected added in its pizza bar by cruise ship operators Norwegian Cruise Line.
Holy Ship! act Kill The Noise has shared a photo of the sign on Twitter, which is titled, ‘Open Pizza Bar For Consumption Only.’
The A+ note, which you can read in full below, says that “sexual acts with our handcrafted pizzas can bring unintended health consequences and can pose a safety hazard for other passengers aboard our journey”.
“Due to incidents on previous sailings in which patrons engaged in uncouth behavior in the cafe, we feel it is our duty to remind our guests that pizza is for eating, not fornicating,” operators say.
“If you suffer from Sitophilia, or the sexual desire to fornicate with foods such as our pizzas, please inquire with one of our specialists in the medical bay below deck.”?
And yes, Sitophilia is a real thing.
More than two dozen people — including New York-based DJ and producer Gina Turner — were arrested for drug possession while boarding the Holy Ship! boat last weekend, but we’re yet to hear any reports about incidents of pizza pleasuring.
Read Norwegian Cruise Line’s note, below.