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Normies.

We know who you are.

Or should that be we know who WE are?

We all have much in common, much that is normal. We do our hair, update our wardrobe, say the new sayings, go to the hip places, try the new dishes, dig the new genres of whatever and the rest, then pass fleeting judgement on all and sundry.

But the truth is a little different to our assertions. Most of the time we put on the latest easy-access (even more easily downloaded) mask to hide our own crippling insecurities and give us the stones to actually get up and leave the house. We all do it -- why bother hiding the fact? Once we rebelled against what made us feel uncool by bagging it. Now all we need to do is quickly check our phone and hey presto, all the talking points, tidbits and "facts" we need to bluff our way through any situation. At least until we get home and download aforementioned kit.

But why bother with all the hassle?

Be honest, when it's Friday, do we listen to Cold Wave cassette B-sides by unsigned artists from Eastern Bloc countries (only pre-'84, of course) or do we play Blondie / Prince / Michael Jackson / INXS / TLC / Nelly / Taylor Swift and the like? We listen to the hits -- you know we do.

We find ourselves revealing our Normie core so often we don't even register it:

"Let's go to KFC on the way home"

"Do you know the score?"

"How about that latest celebrity whatever?"

We agree when someone says, "That new Bieber is actually pretty good" and follow up with "Even Four Tet played it."

"Well if Four Tet played it ..."

It's ok that our self-image of being a hip, with it cat is not set in concrete. Nobody's is. We can just throw around phrases like 'post modernism' and make out fine. Nobody knows the difference because they're all Normies too.

Or is that WE'RE all Normies too?

PopRocks, every Friday at The Toff In Town.

Don't fight the feeling.

Normies come in.

FREEEEEEEEE